Chapter 1:

I dont' know where to begin to describe where I am. Yes, Orlando, in my living room watching the cooking channel with a special about thanksgiving listening to my AC run in November (it was around 85 today).

A mentor and brother in Christ of mine through college (Tyler Dirks) used to ask me all the time, where are you? This question started off as being "where are you spiritually?" but then turned into simply "where are you?"I don't know why this question changed over time, but what I've come to think, or realize that often where we are spiritually, where we are with God often encompasses how we are doing in our whole life. How we are doing in relationships with others, how we are doing professionally, how we are in our free time, how we spend our free time. Do we spend that free time trying to grow or do we spend that time getting by. It is how we are with God that reflects how we are in the rest of our lives.

This is something I have been focusing on recently. It is 40 days before Christmas. While many may complain that Thanksgiving hasn't come, blah blah blah why not begin to celebrate Christmas now. No, not shop our hearts out to the point where we spend the next 18 months paying back the pointless crap we bought people. Yet, we focus on the reason for the season. Yes, it is cliche but I believe there is some truth to it. So this first chapter, will focus on spiritual growth hopefully in the next 40 days there will be a change, a growth because quite honestly, I do not know where I am spiritually. I need to fall back in love. Not that I've fallen out of love, its just I have done my bridegroom wrong.

This will take me examining my life, finding areas that are spiritually hindering and prayerfully discerning those and doing what God lays on my heart. The first step is finding a church. Yes, I will admit, I moved here in September and it is now November and I haven't stepped foot in a church. Excuses I have one for every week. I have listened to sermons online but that's not good enough. I need to, God calls us to be a part of a body, a body of believers, a body that comes to worship him "for where 2 or more are gathered..." But going to church won't solve my spiritual deadness. Its not like a wilted plant in the hot summer sun that just need water and a bit more shade. No I am in a spiritual winter. There is a tree, there is evidence that it once has produced fruit and there are leaves all around it, mabie a couple still on, but this tree isn't producing fruit right now, in fact this tree is very fragile. If there was a strong ice storm in my life this tree just might break. I need to get back to spring.

Here's to spring.

Until-

Matt

Preface

Why the next chapter? 

Its been a while since I've written. This past summer I wrote of my travels backpacking through Europe. Since being back stateside I have missed the outlet of writing. But what to write about? What to say? Will my voice be heard? How often will I write? None of these I know the answer to, but what I do know is there is a voice within me that is dying to be heard. A venting of sorts, yes but just the same it will be about where I am in my life. What chapter I am in.